3 Reasons Why Bullies Bully
The act of bullying is nothing new. This aggressive behavior has been around for ages. In fact, I can recall several instances in the late 90’s where bullying was the highlight, of many that I attended high school with. Most of it consisted of name calling, taking of property, unnecessary and unwanted contact, and cruel jokes just to name a few. As a youth speaker and teen expert, I have noticed that bullying has skyrocketed, to the mountaintop of topics of discussion and focus for many schools across the country.
As I’ve been booked and traveled across the nation to address this issue, the first question that many ask is why do bullies bully? That’s an excellent question! Through research, consulting with administrators, teachers and speaking with young people, I have identified 3 reasons why individuals feel the need to activate this aggressive behavior. These are certainly not all of the reasons but some of them.
1) A sense of control and strength – Many administrators that I have had the pleasure to interview, tell me that students love the sensation of control and strength when bullying others. Control is something that feeds their young egos to lead individuals, to believe that they dictate how one feels.
2) A need to take their anger out on others – Contrary to what some think, our younger generation deals with a plethora of issues that as adults we tend to overlook or even shrug off. It always amazes, me when I hear adults say “when you get in the real world”. Insinuating that they live in a fictious world with absolutely no problems and worries what so ever. However, these young individuals are very much into the real world and deal with real life issues that often times are difficult for them to bare. As a result, some become depressed and defeated. Others angry and upset. Unwitting of how to channel their anger, many young people take how they feel and release those emotions onto someone who they feel are defenseless. This is a sad reality that happens in most of our schools and communities. As educators, speakers, consultants, etc., it’s imperative that we teach young people how to channel their anger and rage so it’s not hurtful or devestating to others.
3) Difference(s) – After spending some time with students, I have found that many bullies prey on other students that are looked upon as being different. Different as in race, sexual orientation, ethnicity, beliefs, and even handicaps and medical or mental disorders. Instead of accepting diversity, many students repel and become aggressive towards those who don’t look, act, and believe as they do. Diversity and acceptance of others must be a part of the culture of any school or institution. It’s virtually impossible to prevent the act of bullying and aggressive behavior if we allow students to be disrespectful to those who don’t seemingly look like them.
To sum it up, there are various reasons as to why students feel the need to bully others. Hopefully these 3 gave you a deeper insight into why bullies bully. Please join the conversation, leave a comment, and lets together help prevent bullying in America.
For event or meeting planners interested in having me address their student groups, please click here http://www.qwhitehead.com/hire-quentin. I would love to help you cultivate a bully FREE culture!